Tuesday, May 10, 2011

rearranging.

Like I've posted before, colorquiz.com is always pretty spot on with its results. I've had some chronic drama with my roommate and although I kind of fell in love with San Antonio, my living arrangement isn't exactly working for me. That and I have a wedding to plan. Look at what this thing is telling me:

Free personality analysis from ColorQuiz.com.Generated on Tue, 10 May 2011 09:07:16 -0700. Your Existing Situation "Insecure with himself, needs stable roots and emotional security. Seeking an environment which provides comfort and few problems." Your Stress Sources "Wishes for freedom and independence, free from limitations and restrictions except for the ones she choices to give himself." Your Restrained Characteristics "His desire to avoid open conflict and tension forces her to put her desires on hold, even though she is feeling restrained and uneasy." Current situations have left her feeling overwhelmed and tormented. Needs to avoid further activity or demands and concentrate on relaxing and becoming emotionally sound. "Feels she is not receiving her fair share and is unable to rely on anyone for support or sympathy. she keeps her emotions bottled up, leaving her quick to take offense to small things. she tries to make the best of her situation." Your Desired Objective "Does not feel there is any purpose in fulfilling her hopes and dreams, and therefore chooses the easy way and avoids conflicts. " Your Actual Problem Searching security and a position in where the demands of others is not put solely on her.

The whole part about not seeing a purpose in my dreams isn't 100% though. It's just that my plan WAS San Antonio..with my productive best friend. We had both talked about San Antonio being something completely different to us than what it is now. I've kept my word to someone I thought was my friend so I can't really say "what if" to that situation anymore. It really saddens me but I have a lot to look forward to: happiness, peace, stability, and security..FINALLY.  Those sound like really easy things to ask for but believe me, I've struggled with these my whole life and I feel like the direction I'm going in my life will give me that peace of mind I've longed for. My fiance has been a great help ever since we've sorted our issues out and at this point, delayed gratification is the best way to go. People my age will go hard right now and forget about their responsibilities but have nothing to show for it later; they'll just have their memories. I'll balance work and play now and end up having a lot more accomplished in my young life and will and be able to play just as hard as I worked later. It's just a little discipline that'll go a looonnggg way. I've got to learn to appreciate what I do have instead of looking at what I could have. My life may be flawed, but I'm blessed. I'm ready to just take things a day at a time for a change and enjoy life's simple pleasures instead of reaching for something ahead of my time. It's taken probably a lot longer than it should've but I think I'm finally learning.
'til next time, stay classy!♥